A Memoir





A Memoir
by Caitlin Billings

When Caitlin Billings became a therapist, she did so with an intention to heal from her past. She wasn’t planning on a mental health relapse or an involuntary psychiatric hold. She was a mother now. A mental health professional. She thought the issues she’d faced in her past were dealt with, tucked away forever.

She was wrong.

Over the years, Billings contends with bipolar disorder while raising two children and fighting to regain her footing as a clinician. She feels she’s finally gotten a handle on her mental health when, on the cusp of adolescence, her elder child begins to struggle with disordered eating and depressive symptoms. Convinced that she is to blame for her child’s struggles, Billings pivots her attention to this new crisis, determined to keep it together for her family—but after it comes out that sexual abuse has taken place in their home, she questions her ability to protect her children and experiences a relapse.

Amidst all this turmoil, her elder child also comes out as transgender, forcing yet another kind of reckoning. Billings must find a way to accept the many changes and unexpected challenges that have reared up in their lives—and, ultimately, to accept herself.

About the Author

Caitlin Billings lives in the San Francisco Bay Area with her family. A Licensed Clinical Social Worker in the state of California, she specializes in treating complex trauma and currently provides clinical supervision for two Bay Area non-profit organizations.
After initially receiving an undergraduate degree in dance and movement studies from Antioch College in 2000, her desire for a better understanding of the human psyche and to inhabit social change drew her to graduate-level clinical social work.
She received her MSW from Cal Poly Humboldt in 2008. Over the course of her career, Caitlin has worked with court-mandated groups for domestic violence offenders, partial hospitalization programs, substance use programs, residential rehabilitation services, family support services, and survivors of physical and sexual trauma.

Reviews for “In Our Blood”

“This book breaks down the perception of barriers that divide us—between ‘provider’ and ‘consumer,’ between ‘expert’ and ‘patient,’ between ‘sick’ and ‘well’—in a work that speaks to the hope of healing and wholeness for us all.”

—Marya Hornbacher, New York Times bestselling author of Wasted and Madness: A Bipolar Life.

“In stunningly sharp and vivid language…Billings joins a growing number of therapists and doctors who push back against the stigma within the field. Bravo!”

—Willa Goodfellow, Author of Prozac Monologues: A Voice from the Edge

“Caitlin Billings shares the story of both her own mental health struggles and those of her loved ones in a way that is intimate and vulnerable. This book is a beautifully crafted and compelling page-turner. I was rooting for Caitlin and her family the entire time.”

—Melanie D. Gibson, author of Kicking and Screaming: a Memoir of Madness and Martial Arts

“More than a memoir or a case study, this is a page-turner that will draw you all the way in and have you rooting for the author and her family; and maybe even help you feel a little less alone.”

—Dave Stevens, Psychiatric Mental Health Nurse Practitioner

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